Sunday, February 26, 2012

Back from Hiatus

Hey everybody, it’s Mr. Peenutz again. Sorry, it has been a while since I’ve been on here last. I was afraid the peeps knew what I was doing and would shut this site down. I can’t risk that. I need a place to escape, to let my ingenious thoughts out. I am so happy to be back.

First, let us get caught up. WE MOVED! And I love the new house, except the peeps don’t let me roam the property much, which I really don’t understand. They told me I would be happier here because I would have all this space and now, now they won’t even let me out of their sight. I think they think I am stupid, a feeling I sometimes share about them. That is why I wait for them to look away before I run and they do every time, I think because there are too many of us for them to watch.

I run like the wind and investigate the new yard. It smells AMAZING! I can tell there will be lots of new friends for me to make when the weather gets warmer. I can’t wait. I want to meet this snake person they keep telling RooRoo about. For months they have repeated to her, “Snake…RUN!” And she does, she runs away. But I have decided when this is actually recited out in the yard and isn’t a drill, I am going to RUN TO IT. Dah-Da-Da-DAAAH….Mr. Peenutz to the rescue, all I need now is a CAPE! Three words: BEWARE MR. SNAKE!!

Next off, I got a new name. I’ve told you before how we all have like 7 different names besides the one on our danglies, some of mine being: Mongrel, Monster, Gnarles, Dude, Poppa and now Trip….short for Tripod.

On moving day, what an awful day that was, I had to sit in the cage ALL DAY, and I mean….ALL DAY! I was put in there right after I woke the peeps for my morning pee and then was stuck in there, except for some potty breaks, for what felt like….FOREVER! I did get to take a car ride and that was AWESOME. I went with poppa peep in this giant truck that I couldn’t even jump in or out of. I got to ride shotgun, alone. All the other mignons had to ride grouped up in the backseat of the car harnessed into the seatbelts. Not me, I’m special. The world needs to know: Mr. Peenutz is top dog. Except that didn’t help at the new house either, when we got there I was again stuck in a cage with the rest of these tards. And the worst part about that, I was injured, injured at the peeps expense, poppa peep that is, momma peep would never hurt me.

When we first got to the house they let us roam a bit, I think out of pity…poor fools. They always give in to our pathetic, puppy dog eyes. We bombarded them, mostly because we wanted FOOD, they thought because we liked them, which we do a bit I won’t lie, but this was mostly about FOOD.

To start it off, Hazle was jumping at their feet along with a bunch of the others. I was standing behind poppa peep when all of a sudden, he stepped back, and when he did, he stepped on my toe. I was like, “excuse me, my foot was here first”, but then he backed off and gave me lovin’. All was forgiven in his book but not mine. What he didn’t realize was he ripped my toenail out of my foot. Not broke it, ripped it literally out of my toe. All that was left was a hole. Well a hole and lots of blood.

I was fine at first, I can take lots of pain…SHHHH, don’t tell them that, I’ve got them right where I want them in regards to that. But when RooRoo took them my nail and they saw blood on the floor, they freaked out. So then I made them think I did too, but just a little. I’m telling you, I’ve got mad skills with these eyes. Momma peep picked me up and put me on the counter and gave me big, big hugs as she squeezed my foot. The bleeding eventually stopped and now it has pretty much healed, but I’m still minus a toenail. That night they started calling me, Tripod. Now it has been shortened to, Trip. I swear the peeps are the laziest people I know. They are so lazy they can’t even say words; that takes too much effort for them. Good lord, if only they knew how much work it took to be a dog. Speaking of that, I’ve got to go. It is time for my nap. I’ve been up for what seems like an hour, that is 30 minutes past my nap time. Good grief, guess I’ll have to catch you up on the rest some other time. Until then, P out!